5 Questions to Ask Yourself
For many women, being a surrogate is a beautiful journey that teaches them a great deal about love, family and themselves. Because of their positive experiences, many surrogates eventually decide that a second — or even third — surrogacy is in the cards for them.
But, how do you know when it’s the right time to start the surrogacy journey all over again?
The best person to talk to will always be your surrogacy specialist. She can discuss your previous surrogacy journey and your current situation to determine whether you are ready to become a gestational carrier again. If you’re considering this path, don’t hesitate to reach out to American Surrogacy’s team today.
In the meantime, you should start by asking yourself these questions:
1. Do you still meet our agency’s surrogacy requirements?
The first qualification to become a surrogate again is meeting American Surrogacy’s set of surrogacy requirements. Just because you have been a surrogate before doesn’t mean you will automatically get accepted into our program; your situation may have changed since your first journey, and you will need to undergo proper screening to ensure you are 100 percent prepared for another surrogacy process.
Your surrogacy specialist will always discuss our program’s requirements with you before you get started, as well as any exceptions that may be made for your application. As a reminder, here are the basic requirements you will need to meet:
- Be between the ages of 21 and 38
- Have a BMI between 19 and 32
- Be currently raising a child
- Have no more than five vaginal births and no more than four cesarean births
- Have no major complications from previous pregnancies, including your gestational pregnancy
- Be able to travel as needed
- Not be on antidepressants or anti-anxiety medication for 12 months
See our agency’s full list of surrogate requirements here.
2. How long has it been since your last surrogacy journey?
Part of our requirements for surrogates is that there have been at least six months since your last vaginal or cesarean birth. That applies to gestational pregnancies, as well.
Pregnancy and childbirth can take a great toll on a woman’s body, and you will need time to recover before you can commit yourself to a year or more of medical tests and procedures and another pregnancy. When you can become a surrogate again will always be up to your personal physician and the fertility clinic with which you work; they will have the best idea of whether or not you are recovered enough for pregnancy.
You are welcome to call your specialist at 1-800-875-BABY(2229) any time after your first gestational pregnancy to express your interest in returning to our agency. Your specialist may be able to complete preliminary screenings while you wait for your six-month clearance. However, our surrogates’ safety is of the utmost importance, so our specialists will not allow you to get started until you are deemed healthy enough to do so.
3. How did your family feel about your last journey? How will they feel about this new journey?
When you become a surrogate, you’re not just committing yourself — you are also committing your family to a year or more of an intense journey. It’s not enough to ask whether you are ready to become a surrogate again. Is your family ready for you to take this journey again?
You should have an open and honest conversation with your entire family before you decide to be a gestational carrier again. They may feel differently about the surrogacy process having now been through it all and understanding exactly what it requires from them and from you. You should also consider your family’s current situation — Are your children older and will better comprehend what you are doing? Can your spouse still provide support in the way they did last time?
Don’t just assume that if your family was fine with surrogacy before, that they will be fine with surrogacy again. Make them an active part of your decision-making process.
4. What roles are your former intended parents playing in this decision?
Sometimes, gestational surrogates are inspired to do this journey again because of their intended parents. Your former intended parents may be interested in another surrogacy journey, and they may have asked you whether you are interested in carrying for them again.
Being a repeat surrogate for certain intended parents can seem like a dream come true. You already have an established relationship, and you know what the surrogacy journey will be like with them as your partners. However, it’s important that you’re not considering surrogacy again just because they’ve asked you to. There is no reason to feel pressured into being a gestational carrier again, especially if you’re not ready.
If this is your situation, try to take the intended parents out of the conversation. Would you still be willing to go through the challenges and rewards of surrogacy for other intended parents, too?
5. Is your lifestyle conducive to becoming a surrogate again?
If you have positive memories from your previous surrogacy journey, it’s only natural to want to replicate those with another journey. But, it’s important that you not let your emotions cloud your judgement. Becoming a surrogate again is a huge decision.
Think about everything that you considered before becoming a surrogate for the first time. You should think about all those things and more. Are you truly emotionally ready for surrogacy — especially a surrogacy that may not be as great as the first? Can you commit yourself physically and mentally to another surrogacy process, no matter what happens?
While this is an important conversation to have with yourself, it’s also an important one to have with your surrogacy specialist. Our team at American Surrogacy is always here to help our clients do what is best for them and their family. That includes helping you determine whether being a surrogate is the best choice for you at this time.
To learn more, please contact your surrogacy specialist online or at 1-800-875-BABY(2229) today.